Foreign Poster Friday

It's a Polanski Two-fer! Not only do you get two totally awesome Polish posters for his epic Rosemary's Baby, but you also get the novel (see below).

Can we all agree that these posters are much, much cooler than our lame green one featuring an over-sized picture of Mia Farrow's head?

The Best Horror Literature: Rosemary's Baby

The Best Horror Literature: Dracula

A few factoids:



Not actually based on Vlad Tempes.


Sexy like Frank Langella? No. Gary Oldman as he seduces Winona Ryder? No. Dracula is actually an old, decrepit miser.

A lover? Not exactly. It's more entertaining this way, but the Count has long lost the ability to love. His motives are spite, lust, and, of course, the need for blood.

Did you know that you can star in Dracula? And for only $22!

Stoker (pictured at right), partially based the character Dracula on his then-boss, the owner of the theatre where he worked.














A vampire bat can eat up to half its body weight in 20 minutes. Its saliva contains anticoagulants that prevent its hosts blood from clotting.

The Best Horror Literature: Let the Right One In

I know this post is late--I've been absent a few days, but I promise I'm back to stay. What inspired me to post this today is that I went and saw Let Me In. I was reminded, while I sat there spellbound, that the novel the movie is based on is one of the best books I have ever read, and I doubt I will ever read anything as inventive, emotional, or well-written ever again. Unless it's a new Clive Barker novel, of course.

Please don't talk to me about the Swedish film: it's just OK. It's not the most brilliant film of all time and no, I don't mind reading subtitles. I'm not lazy. I am, however, a fan of clear and entertaining storytelling, which the original film did not have. Matt Reeves' remake does. It also incorporated almost every interesting aspect of the novel and put it on the screen... except for the best part of the entire book, which is the most original thing I have ever read in any horror novel. I won't spoil it for you, but I will say: go read the book.


Anyway, on to why this novel is groundbreaking. I have always held the belief that horror is more entertaining when, at its core, the story being told is not a horrific one. This goes for novels, short stories, and films. John Ajvide Lindqvist's Let the Right One In is not really a vampire novel. It's a book about childhood loneliness and the awkwardness of teenage love that happens to feature vampires. The novel is almost a coming-of-age book, with Oskar finding out more about love, himself, and the ways of the world than he would ever have liked. There has never been a more poignant portrayal of the bullied, isolated, angry preteen than in this book. And then to top it all off, we have some child-vampire carnage, we get a first-hand account of what it feels like to become a vampire (that is, what the internal process entails, emotionally and physically), and the all-too-human vulnerability of being confronted by a predator.

If you want to read the three best vampire novels of all time, go check out and Dracula, 'Salem's Lot, and Let the Right One In. You will not be disappointed.

The Best Horror Literature: "The Raven"

We all know Edgar Allen Poe is the best. But did you know that today is the anniversary of his death? It is! And so, in honor of this horrific genius, here is a video of CHRISTOPHER WALKEN reading "The Raven." Enjoy!

The Best Horror Literature: The Melancholy Death of Oyster Boy and Other Stories

Tim Burton wrote a book? Yes, yes he did. And it's a children's book, no less. The Melancholy Death of Oyster Boy and Other Stories is a must-read. Here's some of the book's brilliance:

The Best Horror Literature: Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark

When I was a kid I was obsessed with the series Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark. There were three main books in the series, but I think more came out later. These books are landmarks in the genre because they're just folktales retold for modern audiences--not just that, but modern children. These books are so creepy and fun. The main draw for me, though, are all the amazing drawings. For your enjoyment: here's a collection...

The Best Horror Literature: "Snow, Glass, Apples"

Neil Gaiman is one of the greatest authors of all time; his talents extend to graphic novels, horror novels, comedy-dramas, kids' books, and beyond. He has also released two collections of short stories, Fragile Things and Smoke and Mirrors. Both are must-reads. Both books also contain one piece that should be classics in the horror genre. For Fragile Things, that honor goes to "Harlequin Valentine," which is just so beautiful. In Smoke and Mirrors, we have the greatest of all Gaiman short stories: "Snow, Glass, Apples."


There are some ideas that are just so obvious we never see them. The stories and movies that arise when these obvious ideas are captured tend to be my favorites. Gaiman has the uncanny ability to find most of these; take, for instance, "Snow, Glass, Apples," which is a twist on the classic tale "Snow White." The brilliance here is that it's told from the "Evil" Queen's point of view, and Snow White is, shall we say, not so innocent. Or human. The genius just oozes off the page. I will never look at that girl in the glass coffin in the same way. It's creepy, true to the folklore Snow White's condition is linked to, and the voice is so distinct and convincing that old Queenie becomes a sympathetic character.

The Best Horror Literature: The Ring Trilogy

I proudly proclaim that The Ring is one of the worst movies ever, and, for the record, Ringu is not that awesome either. The books those movies are based on, however, are absolutely amazing. I've said it before and I'll say it again: go read a book. And then after you read that, there are two others! That's right: a trilogy! The second book, Spiral, is just as good as Ring; the third, Loop, is pretty terrible (think The Ring meets Escape from New York meets Blade Runner).


These books were all written by Koji Suzuki, who is often hailed as the "Japanese Stephen King." This isn't surprising, because he writes extremely well. The idea that watching television could kill you is revolutionary but...(spoiler alert!)...the idea that a video could contain a virus, which mutates and is, for all intents and purposes, the perfect killer, is AWESOME.




Oh, and here's a picture of Suzuki with his latest horror novel, which is printed on rolls of TOILET PAPER.

The Best Horror Literature: 'Salem's Lot

King's second novel, 'Salem's Lot, is the greatest vampire novel of all time, save Dracula.




And here's a screencap of one of the film's scarier moments:

Happy October! The Best Horror Literature

If you didn’t know, or couldn't recognize from my pseudo-banner at the top of this blog, The Crypt of Horror is based off Tales from the Crypt—not just the show, but the comic series. Horror literature is my thing. I’ve always read it, will probably always read it; I write it, and plan on writing it for as long as I can. (My first book, a collection of horror short stories, Predilection, was released last year).

To celebrate Halloween, most blogs are doing a month-long feature. My blog will focus on the greatest pieces of horror literature. When I can, I’ll try to provide some text with each feature, but school and work are pretty crazy, so a few pictures or a video might be the best I can do.

For the first entry, I’ve chosen my favorite piece of literate of all time: Clive Barker’s Books of Blood series, six volumes of short stories. First, let’s talk about the movies that have been made from these stories. The Book of Blood is based off of the two stories that begin and end the series. It’s not really a good movie, but the stories are fabulous. The Midnight Meat Train is next—that movie is pretty great. Book two features Dread, one of the best movies I have ever seen (the picture to the right is artwork from the film); it’s also my favorite story in the series, save “Jacqueline Ess: Her Will and Testament.” I cannot recommend Dread enough. The story is supreme, the acting is spot-on, and it is actually scary. It gets under your skin. Book three’s standout, “Rawhead Rex,” was made into a film but it is so bad Clive has disowned it and I can’t even find a copy to watch it. Volume five of the series has “The Forbidden,” which was adapted into Candyman; I maintain that movie is a poetic masterpiece. Volume six has the near-novella “The Last Illusion,” which Clive adapted into his third film The Lord of Illusions. Of all Clive’s films this one is the best—complex story, great special effects, and Clive managed to merge a horror film with a detective drama with ease. Anyway….

OH MY GOD this is the best collection of short stories I have ever—EVER—read. Take a chance and read them; you’ll enjoy it. Clive did a special series of paintings to serve as the covers for the 1986 reprint (the second from the bottom, of the woman with skull earrings and spirits in her hair, is the adaptation of “Jacqueline Ess,” which hangs proudly on my wall).

It's Foreign Poster Friday!

I decided I wanted to have a regular feature on this blog (other than plugs for my lists on horrornews.net), so I decided that I would feature foreign posters for some of our favorite films. Foreign poster designs have always fascinated me: why does so much change from the American posters? And, usually, I ask, "Why can't our posters be that cool?" Perhaps we will never know.

I know it's not technically Friday yet, but I'm going to a midnight showing of Let Me In and I want to work on a review tomorrow. So, I present to you the debut image for Foreign Poster Friday! This one is a classic example of how to do it right. It seems no coincidence that this is for a Cronenberg movie.

The American poster is cool and all--that image of Stephen Lack with white eyes as he's draining that guy's mind is awesome, but it's just a production still sort of image, not an actual piece of art like this.

Want to Play a Game?

My newest list, "13 Greatest Horror Doctors" is up on www.horrornews.net. In honor of this, let's play...

NAME THAT DOCTOR!

So, here are cropped pictures of some of the doctors on the list. How many can you correctly guess and what order do you think I put them in? Who should be #1?

Film Review: Don't Look Up

Here’s the lowdown on how this works: I review a film; throughout I will give scores (+2, -6, etc.) based on what the film does well and not-so-well. In the end, the movie’s total score is what it gets out of ten. Simple enough, yeah? Since this is my first time, I’ll keep it short.

Don’t Look Up (2009)

Let’s get down to business, shall we? There’s a reason this was direct-to-DVD. Most of the film is terrible. My best friend found it at a Redbox for crying out loud! Not a good way to get your film noticed; McDonald’s isn’t a place horror movie freaks go to find their latest fix (-1). Add to this that the film is a remake. But wait, there’s more! It’s actually a remake of a film that’s about remaking a film! How clever! Not really (-1). For those that are wondering, here’s the synopsis, courtesy of IMDB: “Evil spirits released from old celluloid causes a film crew to slowly go insane while in production on a new project.”

If you watch the trailer, you’ll notice it hypes the original director, Hideo Nakata, who “created” The Ring and Dark Water. Neither of those movies is really any good. Also, Nakata did not create The Ring. That honor goes to Koji Suzuki, who wrote the trilogy (get up and go read something!). For not giving credit where credit is due (-1). Also, Fruit Chain is not an “acclaimed director” in the States. He should be, but he isn’t. Good try, though.

As stated earlier, Fruit Chan (who did the “Dumplings” segment from Three… Extremes) directs, and Eli Roth stars as a temperamental horror film director (true to life?) who dies in the first two minutes. For these, and yes, I mean director, actor, and his death 2 minutes in, (+2). That character also has a great moustache (+1). To his credit, Eli gives the best performance out of the entire cast, something we can probably thank Quentin Tarantino for (+1). That said, the leads do well for themselves, holding their own amongst almost-standard direct-to-DVD fare. But it's not enough to really pull this film out of the vaults.

One thing that does stick out about this film is the special effects. There’s not a lot of gore, but what bloodshed we do see is just red and creepy enough. Way to go! (+3) Most of this film’s power lies in its atmosphere; it’s more like a ghost story/mystery than it is a traditional horror flick (+2 for subgenre-mashing). Every time I think about this movie I want to say that it’s called Don’t Look Now, but that movie’s awesome; for confusion and not having Donald Sutherland (-1).

Total score: 5/10. It wasn’t all that bad, but it’s not all that good either.

TV in Horror Films

Recently the horror blog circuit has been a-buzz with new posts concerning the meme of screencaps focusing on a specific theme. It all started with Checking on my Sausages and has continued through my favorite blogs. I've seen posts focusing on transportation in horror films, the vampire bite, and images of smiling, among others. For my theme I chose the TV.




Signs



The Rocky Horror Picture Show



Shaun of the Dead



Videodrome



Poltergeist



Saw (Short Film)



Saw (Movie)



The Signal



The Ring